The Official Frequent Flier Webpage

 

Real Ultimate Power


Hi, this site is all about frequent fliers, REAL FREQUENT FLIERS.  This site is awesome.    My name is Nick and I can't stop thinking about frequent fliers.  These guys are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.

Facts:

1.    Frequent fliers are mammals.
2.    Frequent fliers fly ALL the time.
3.    The purpose of the frequent flier is to flip out and kill people.


Weapons and gear:

 

  

Frequent flier cards              Expensive luggage   



Amenity Kits



Testimonial:

Frequent fliers can fly anywhere they want! Frequent fliers get upgraded ALL the time and don't even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time. I heard that there was this frequent flier who was eating in first class. And when some dude dropped a bistro bag back in coach the frequent flier killed the entire first class cabin. My friend Scott said that he saw a frequent flier totally uppercut some flight attendant just because they they ran out of champagne.

And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't believe that frequent fliers have REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or they will chop your head off!!!  It's an easy choice, if you ask me.  

Frequent fliers are sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants.  I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart.  These guys are totally awesome and that's a fact.  Frequent fliers are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet.  I can't wait to start earning miles next year.  I love frequent fliers with all of my body (including my pee pee).    


Q and A:.


Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about frequent fliers?
A: Frequent fliers are the ultimate paradox. On the one hand they don't give a crap about miles and status, but on the other hand, frequent fliers are very careful and precise.

Q: I heard that frequent fliers are always cruel or mean.  What's their problem?
A: Whoever told you that is a total liar.  Just like other mammals, frequent fliers can be mean OR totally awesome. 

Q: What do frequent fliers do when they're not flying around or flipping out?
A: Most of their free time is spent in airport clubs and hotels, but sometimes they bitch about miles. (Ask Kevin if you don't believe me.)



This is a picture of my friend Mark showing off.
He's a lot older than me and has better elite status,
which is bragable.



Real Ultimate Power Parodies.
The official Real Ultimate Power site. This site will get you so pumped up you will flip out and kill an entire town!
And my travel/personal blog.